God is Good
I swore off reading the local papers a long time ago. There just too many wasted pages for so many politician spilling out bad bullshit. I don't even read the ones from the west side anymore because if I wanted to read bullshit, and I mean really good bullshit, I'd read blogs and sometimes alternative news portals which often offers lots of really good bullshit. Better bullshit right there, if you ask me.
These days, the only physical contact I have with our local papers is while I'm taking a dump. And only to check on the lottery results. I remember one fine morning tearing a section off when the toilet paper rolls were out and so I used that. It's good for that too.
And just the other day, while taking a dump and checking through the 6/49 results, I was yet again disappointed. The ticket naturally found its way in between my legs and onto my pile of shit. Flipping to the local news section, I read this headline :
"Dam project Gods gift, says assemblymen".
I laughed so hard and I haven't even read the contents. And I laughed harder when the report quoted him saying - "...we must be able to recognise when a good thing comes our way. This is one of the good things. If we turn our back on it, no matter how much we cry for development to come our way, we may have to wait for another 50 years or more for an opportunity like this to come again...".
We cry, did you say? And I'm like whatdafuck.
By the time I read this - "...this billion-ringgit HEP project is the answer to our prayers for development for our people. This is God’s gift to our people. Why must we reject something good? This will change the fate of our community. Of course, the present generation will have to make a few sacrifices to make it a success..." - I was already foaming at my mouth. Epilepsy or some shit like that because I was just laughing my fucking guts out. While taking a dump.
Ah, well, the next time I meet old Simo from Kampung Pain Bojong I'll tell him that a certain politician wants him to be more appreciative of God's gift. I mean, God can't be wrong about gifts and especially the ones which are good.
These days, the only physical contact I have with our local papers is while I'm taking a dump. And only to check on the lottery results. I remember one fine morning tearing a section off when the toilet paper rolls were out and so I used that. It's good for that too.
And just the other day, while taking a dump and checking through the 6/49 results, I was yet again disappointed. The ticket naturally found its way in between my legs and onto my pile of shit. Flipping to the local news section, I read this headline :
"Dam project Gods gift, says assemblymen".
I laughed so hard and I haven't even read the contents. And I laughed harder when the report quoted him saying - "...we must be able to recognise when a good thing comes our way. This is one of the good things. If we turn our back on it, no matter how much we cry for development to come our way, we may have to wait for another 50 years or more for an opportunity like this to come again...".
We cry, did you say? And I'm like whatdafuck.
By the time I read this - "...this billion-ringgit HEP project is the answer to our prayers for development for our people. This is God’s gift to our people. Why must we reject something good? This will change the fate of our community. Of course, the present generation will have to make a few sacrifices to make it a success..." - I was already foaming at my mouth. Epilepsy or some shit like that because I was just laughing my fucking guts out. While taking a dump.
Ah, well, the next time I meet old Simo from Kampung Pain Bojong I'll tell him that a certain politician wants him to be more appreciative of God's gift. I mean, God can't be wrong about gifts and especially the ones which are good.
posted by Demented | Friday, March 27, 2009
2 Comments:
WElcome back, babe.
anon : i never left, babe.
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