Brain Dead
I have often wondered how memory works? Not from a scientific perspective but from an emotional one.
A friend told me the other day that what our minds choose to remember or forget is within our control. But how far back can we remember?
Definitely not our birth.
He says our first memories are typically big moments like a near drowning when our dad races to the bottom of the pool and pull us out or when we first learn to ride a bike. These moments define us, scare us, or delight us and most definitely shape us. And yes, I do remember these ones well.
But my first memory is being told to keep my mouth shut. This was an unsual thing or moment for me. Mom tells me I was an active, almost hyper kid and she and my grandmother had a tough time 'managing' me. Being told to keep quiet was really a big deal. I didn't understand why, but I was being told to keep my mouth shut. I remember that day they had tissues in their hands and I remember that.
We lived near the hospital then and I was used to having lots of relatives from the villages staying over but that day they spoke quietly. And I also remember some were crying. I didn't really understand but I knew something really important was up. So I sat quietly and watched my mom and grandma cry.
That is all I remember.
What amazes me and others about this memory is that I was about two years old. When I asked mom one day, she told me it was my great grand father's funeral. But in my mind I can see that little snapshot of them crying as clear as day. Many people I have told this story to say there is no way I could remember, but I fucking do.
What about the time when I was driving home from work couple of months back and for some reason suddenly remembered a birthday do I attended when I was 9 years old. I remember my kanid getting into a fight with his kid sister apparently because he moved some of the 'treasures' she hid earlier for our treasure hunt game she had planned. I don't know why my memory bank had to release this one then but I immediately called my kanid to get some confirmation. But all he did was laugh and said it was either an early indication of dementia or that the many big cats all these years may have destroyed a good part of my brain cells.
Dementia...dead brain cells?
I don't know.
A friend told me the other day that what our minds choose to remember or forget is within our control. But how far back can we remember?
Definitely not our birth.
He says our first memories are typically big moments like a near drowning when our dad races to the bottom of the pool and pull us out or when we first learn to ride a bike. These moments define us, scare us, or delight us and most definitely shape us. And yes, I do remember these ones well.
But my first memory is being told to keep my mouth shut. This was an unsual thing or moment for me. Mom tells me I was an active, almost hyper kid and she and my grandmother had a tough time 'managing' me. Being told to keep quiet was really a big deal. I didn't understand why, but I was being told to keep my mouth shut. I remember that day they had tissues in their hands and I remember that.
We lived near the hospital then and I was used to having lots of relatives from the villages staying over but that day they spoke quietly. And I also remember some were crying. I didn't really understand but I knew something really important was up. So I sat quietly and watched my mom and grandma cry.
That is all I remember.
What amazes me and others about this memory is that I was about two years old. When I asked mom one day, she told me it was my great grand father's funeral. But in my mind I can see that little snapshot of them crying as clear as day. Many people I have told this story to say there is no way I could remember, but I fucking do.
What about the time when I was driving home from work couple of months back and for some reason suddenly remembered a birthday do I attended when I was 9 years old. I remember my kanid getting into a fight with his kid sister apparently because he moved some of the 'treasures' she hid earlier for our treasure hunt game she had planned. I don't know why my memory bank had to release this one then but I immediately called my kanid to get some confirmation. But all he did was laugh and said it was either an early indication of dementia or that the many big cats all these years may have destroyed a good part of my brain cells.
Dementia...dead brain cells?
I don't know.
posted by Demented | Monday, January 26, 2009
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6 comments
Today was good. It was good because I drove to Tebakang for a gastronomic fare. I was informed many times of this restaurant down at Tebakang bazaar that serves probably the best prawn dishes this part of the island and true enough, the one hour or so journey that it took for me to drive from Kuching was worth every minute. I was not disappointed at all.
I also had wild boar meat and their signature crispy noodle in some Chinese wine tasting sauce which were errr...wild and crispy.