Tired And Worried

It's going to be a long, hard week. Work's been especially heavy since I came back but that's not unusual. I was expecting this. And if it weren't for the fact that I really need to do some overtime due to the piling files on my table, I would be so distressed by now. I only have one full day off this week and that's Sunday. Next week I'm going to put all these aside. I could use some rest, straighten things out and go back to my usual routine again. The boys have been worried. But really, it's no fun coming back from a well deserved break only to be greeted with piles of work and work related problems. I was worried there for a while.

Worry is wasteful isn't it? To me there is really no point in entertaining such an emotion. Better spend energy fixing the CAUSE of the worry rather than to stay awake the whole night WORRYING. Worry is like a flag, it pops up when things are not right. It signifies the fact that we realize that something has to be done to change something that's gone awry. When worried, I try to find the cause and isolate it. Maybe solve or remove it. That would be the ideal.

Some people I know feel that if I don't show any outward signs of worry, it means I don't care. If I'm not losing my head and panicking means I'm being apathetic. Nothing is further from the truth. I do care. It's just that I try not to worry too much. It's a waste of time. Really.

Am I immune to worry? No, I'm human after all so yeah, I do worry. But I never let that dictate my actions. At least I try not to. Of course that's easier said than done. Being human, I can't rationalize everything everytime. I get flustered. I get anxious. I lose my head and act unrationally. I'm sure everyone's heard of the serenity prayer. You know the one where one asks for wisdom to tell the difference between things that one can or cannot change? To me, basically it means to say that one shouldn't worry too much. Change what we can and bear with what we can't.

What else can we do?

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is not to do anything but wait.