Bad Night

I was at this trendy bar yesterday evening, alone and downing Guinness from the tap for a change. The bar was quiet and I was pondering on the wonders of the universe when my phone vibrated in my trousers left pocket, rudely interrupting my train of thoughts.

It was a friend and demanded the long and lat of my coordinates. Minutes later, he arrived, found me at the bar, checked on what I was drinking and ordered the black juice.

And then it started.

He cursed that Ahmad fellow. That politician dude who strongly believe my brosephs of Chinese descent are actually 'squatters' in this beautiful nation of ours. Went on saying that he had a sudden urge to slit the throat of Ahmad's kind just because the big thing that was supposed to happen on September 16 didn't materialise. He mentioned something about the ISA and some blogger dude who messed around with the nations flag and shit and asked what I thought. Told him I didn't really care.

And he continued ranting on a bizarre political conspiracy theory in relation to September 16, 20, 23 and some other dates in fucking October.

After my fourth pint and his second, he abruptly said, "Lets go".

And I'm like, "Why the fuck for?"

"But aren't you invited to Nick's engagement party?", he asked.

I have completely forgotten about the invitation and honestly at that point in time, I just didn't want to move from the bar. I haven't met Nick for more then 10 years now but I reasoned that since it was just his engagement, it would be alright to miss it. It wasn't like he was getting married or something. Told my friend I preferred to stay and that I'll make it up to Nick somehow. And besides, it was past 9:00pm and very late. But my friend would have none of it and literally begged that I accompanied him.

What greeted us were about 30 men and women eating and drinking in what my friend later described as saturnalian revelry. People were loud. We shook hands with the guests and found Nick's parents in the crowd. His father, who obviously had too much to drink muttered something and signalled to the designated usher to lead us to the 'happy' group, as he referred to them. We were quickly led outside the house to a group of men who were very, very happy indeed. I saw many empty beer cans scattered around them, enough to float a fucking sunken frigate. And they were also very loud.

We were informed that the engagement proper was in the morning and they had been drinking since. Nick, apparently was knocked flat out very early and had to be carried into his bedroom. I figured it wouldn't be long before all of them gets knocked out of their senses too by the way the drinking was progressing. They were very, very, very happy.

I looked at my friend and cursed under my breath. I knew I shouldn't have come. I stayed for an hour or so, did the obligatory drinking before quietly making my way outside the compound and to my ride. I was just not tuned to this kind of errr...happiness.

I stopped at a coffee shop, bought 4 cans of big cats, drove home and watched the beautiful Miss Tera Patrick taking on the very big Julian Rios. That's when my fun started.

Noisy

This damn world is such a noisy place, isn’t it? I learned a new word today-cacophonous. With hand phones ringing, televisions and radio’s blaring, cars engines surging…incessant noise. Talking heads every which way we turn. It seems as if we’re afraid of quiet. It is as if we won’t be able to survive even a few moments in the good dentist’s waiting room without the latest episode of that stupid Indonesian soap at 2:30pm to keep us company. They showed that when I visited my dentist two days ago. Stupid shit.

And what about that riotous inner voices, the ones that rings in your head-the long to-do lists, the nagging worries about shit and all, concerns about money and health and the state of the fucking world or in this instance, the state of my fucking country. My anger at why I just can't stop this habit of lighting up - noisy reminders that life is so much less than we’d like it to be.

I just got back from the village a few days ago. My own village this time. It was good. It was quiet. It’s not likely that I’ll be attending a silent retreat anytime soon now, so I’m looking for other ways to gain some of the benefits of silence in my daily life. A sure antidote to that ever present voice in my head telling me what I should be doing, not to mention the noises imposed so rudely upon me by this so called fucking modern society.

Could it be as simple as sitting quietly with my coffee enjoying the rich aroma wafting over the rim? Lunching in silence, savoring each bite, noticing the tastes and textures that pass my lips. Drinking my big cats at Ruai...errrmm...don't think this one qualifies. Ruai just gets too noisy sometimes. Unplugging for a part of each day - switching off the phone and music and computer. And in time, I might consider expanding these episodes of quiet time into an entire morning, day, or even the weekend.

I think I might just give that a try.