Traditions

Yesterday marked my last day of grieving for Fred. The gang suggested seven days to be appropriate as a show of respect to the brother. There were no specific conditions or taboo to be observed and we were free to do or not do something to show him our love. Some of the boys went unshaven while others stayed away from their watering holes. No need for me to get into the technicalities of what I did but mine involved a lot of time spent at my place partaking in mindless indulgence of single arm exercises - Fred would have approved of this.

Being native is tough. Even in death. I found out there were a number of taboos that Fred's family had to observed before they were 'freed'. I was talking to one of his older uncles and was appalled at the absurdity of some of it. For example, the immediate family were not allowed to eat vegetables for 40 days. And if the deceased left a widow, she was to carry a scissor with her wherever she went and until one of the deceased immediate family dies was she allowed to throw it away. But this was the old ways, I was told.

And so we buried Fred last Saturday. I intended to fly back the same night but was persuaded to stay for some merry-making. I expected this as I've been to my fellow native brothers and sisters funerals before and having a bit of laugh after sending the deceased to his rightful place was, somewhat considered appropriate. One cannot be crying forever, one of the uncles said. And so I stayed.

We were having a strict non-vegetarian dinner when the merry-making started just outside of Fred's family house. I quickly took leave from the table and walked out. What greeted me was most disturbing. There were four small tables erected and surrounded by little boys and girls, parents included and they were happily putting their money on some strange characters displayed on said tables. Little baby boys and baby girls, folks!!!. I noticed a few were barely even four years old and they were actually making a bit.

Its tradition, they explained and was allowed. The gambling went on late into the night. The children went to bed while the parents continued. The drinking got a bit rowdier and there was a lot of laughter.

Fred would have approved of this.